Lately, Ive been feeling in a funk. Just not myself and the only word that would describe it is “bleh.” Its hard to figure out what is excatly going on and why I feel this way. If youve been following for a while then you know this unfortunatly happens alot, well a lot more than I would like it to happen. For the past three and a half weeks I havent been home. Ive been working at a camp which typically makes me feel closer to God and our relationship, as well as closer to my husband and kids. But this year something is different.
Whats different about this year, I have no idea. I had a new devotional I was really excited to do while I am at camp and for some reason, unlike the others I’ve done in the past, there is little to no application. Or if there is I am struggling to find it. So after I finish my devotions I am left with a “what now” mindset. like okay i read my devotions but how does it improve myself and I go about my day forgetting everything I’ve read.
Something happened yesterday that made me laugh a bit though. As I was walking a stack of leaves fell almost hitting me right on the head. Of course when something falls from the sky what do you do? Look up. So I did, I looked up to see where it came from, didn’t see anything and went about my day. Later in the day as I was walking guess what happened? Another stack of leaves fell and almost hit me on the head again. So of course I stood there and looked up, and stayed looking up for a little while. Either a squirrel is out to get me or someone much much bigger is trying to tell me something.
As I stood there staring at the sky a song came into my head “look up child” by Lauren Daigle. I’ve listened to this song numerous times but i never actually listened to the words that are spoken through the song. Today for my devotions I decided to look at those lyrics and see how, if at all I could relate. If you haven’t read those lyrics I suggest you do. As I was reading them one part really stood out.
“Where are you now, when all I feel is doubt? Where are you now? When I cant figure it out, Oh I hear you say, I hear you say Look up Child, Look up Child..”
Thats excatly what I did, and wow did my perspective change.
I feel like more times then not I am always looking down, whether its looking down at a phone, looking at my feet to make sure I dont fall, or just looking down at my kids. I forget all the time to look up. Look up at my creator who created this life I live. I need to look up and see the beautiful masterpiece He created, whether its a sunrise, sunset, or just puffy white clouds. I need to spend some time laying in the grass and looking up. Maybe next time I need a mommy timeout Ill take it outside instead of eating my secret stash of cookies in the bathroom. So this is your daily reminder to look up, you never know what you will find.